To some, the word “marriage” can be one of the most frightening words used in a sentence. In fact, I used to not even like it. At least for me, it seemed to have a negative connotation and brought to mind the thought of “settling down,” and “losing one’s freedom.” But when I really started thinking about it, I realized how messed up this view was and began to wonder who was putting these thoughts in my head? Sure wasn’t God! And I didn’t like that. So here’s an alternate view:

If you take the time to educate yourself, (which is exactly what I’ve done), you’ll realize that marriage is defined as the “legitimate union between husband and wife.” Ok, makes sense. But if you dive deeper and break that apart, what does it mean?

* Legitimate- or “legit.” We all know what that means. Synonyms include “real,” “accepted,” and “allowed”

* Union- “reciprocity,” “closeness”

* Between- “restricted to,” “among,” “linking”

* Husband- “man,” “guy”

* And- “and… lol”

* Wife- “woman,” “girl”

Isn’t that what we want? To be “married!?”…”Merry-ied,” “Happy?”

And if you still hate the word, then don’t you like the idea of “finding your other half,” and having your love be ACCEPTED, REAL, and ALLOWED? How about having CAREFREE love, that is, not having to worry about someone ditching, giving up, or bailing?

At least for me, it sounds pretty sweet. Ideal, in fact. And if you’re a Christian, you’ll realize that this “legitimate union between girl and guy” is a reflection, (but never replacement of) God’s love for us. God wants us to be happy and designed this union to give us a glimpse of the pleasure, security, commitment, and happiness that He provides.

When we dull God’s ideal creation with hookups and the union of body and soul before marriage, it only hurts us… I know from experience. I, and others I’ve met, have tried to cut corners and leave legitimacy out of the picture, and it’s only left us a mess. Our love wasn’t “real,” or “accepted,” by God, our families, and even ourselves.

And if we do think we’ve met our other half…someone that we would enjoy waking up to each day ☀️, going on vacations with ✈️, cooking meals for 🍔, making love to 😍, joking around with 💁🏽, helping 🙇🏽, guiding 👫, listening to, 🎤, etc., then why not get the ball rollin’, and set your sights on the possibility of marriage! And until you can get your lives in order, by finishing school, getting a job, etc., find healthy ways to deepen your connection with each other, and save the union of body and soul for when you’ve really made your love legitimate.  It will only make the possibility and transition to marriage easier, leave you with peace of mind in your decision to commit, and give you something exciting to look forward to.

Prayers for the strength and courage to do what’s right in God’s eyes from nowon.Xo,V.